Before We Are Ghosts (WIP) - demo update 28 Apr 2023

Alright, its official, I NEED more, this is not a want, this is a need
The way you switched in-between the different characters and allowed us to pick choices through other’s eyes was awesome imo
A few capitalization errors here and there, but overall it was perfect for me

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I apologize for taking some time to reply; thank you for all so much for the support! I hope the rest of the story will continue to live up to your hopes and expectations<3

Under the cut as it got long:

Thank you for the offer @eiwynn - just you being here, and your encouragement on the support thread, has been more than enough.

@yb_minhee - Thank you for your lovely comment too! I have added those typos to the list of edits I need to make. Also, regarding the name - MC’s powers allow them to save the ones that others might miss in a rescue; hence they tend to be seen as a ‘lifeline’ for them!

@Sakura_Higanbana28 - Would “that other game” be, by any chance, The Grim and I? It’s one of my favorite stories that never fail to make me cry…

Comments like yours will certainly motivate me not to slack off @Aethelric!

Thank you @raerae - I’ll do my best add options where you can choose to have ‘begun’ this relationship in the past, prior to the incident :slight_smile:

I too have a great fondness of bittersweet stories - angst will definitely feature quite a bit in this tale, but I will but I hope that the lighter moments will help to ease some of the pain.

Thank you @GrimReaperJr1232! And I so sorry but I couldn’t help but chuckle at how apt your name is here…

You’re too kind, @Cingulum_diaboli! Thank you for your lovely words here, and for your sweet tags on tumblr as well.

@Empress_Nightmare - I can only hope it will live up to expectations! Also, I just want to say thank you your support of so many authors; I see you leaving comments on almost every WIP thread here. I really respect that, because that’s something not many will do <3

Holy yikes that’s a lot of typos. Thank you for catching them @Xoromin! I was quite nervous of including the interlude at first, as I know perspective changes can fall flat sometimes. I’m glad it wasn’t the case for you!

(Woops, can’t mention more than ten names.)

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Did I get everyone? I hope I got everyone.

Again under the cut as it got long:

I’ll do my best to write chapter one as fast as I can, @Packo and @nejilo! I spent a long time trying to put the things I’m feeling into words, and I’m glad you like it. Thank you both for sharing your thoughts; I’m really touched that you’ve returned to the forums to comment here <3

Thank you @Valixon! I hope you will enjoy the rest of it too :slight_smile:

I’m grateful that you gave it a chance, @SorFake! Silver’s POV happens to be the one I enjoyed writing the most too.

@ChaoticWhisp - many thanks for spotting those typos! I will be rectifying them in the next update. Also, I see what you mean about that dialogue with Ezann - I had struggled with writing that part, and will think of a way to make it smoother!

(Also, fun fact - the interlude sequence actually did not exist at first… And then inspiration struck. I hope it hasn’t been too immersion breaking.)

Thanks for catching those typos too @Paradox1! Your words are incredibly sweet and humbling as well <3

That’s really high praise @Shinkansen99 - I truly hope I can deliver for the rest of the story too.

I spent way too long figuring out what was wrong. Turns out I coded it under the incorrect variable… woops. Thanks for the spot @boobear_o!

Tensei will make a reappearance in chapter one, so you won’t be missing him for much longer, @milaswriting :relaxed: thanks you for your continued words of encouragement! They really mean a lot, especially coming from an esteemed author such as yourself. I promise to read Golden soon!

Thank you @Sneeky! The perspective changes and hopping between past and present will be a recurring theme (at least for the first few chapters) - hopefully I’ll be able to pull it off without confusing readers!

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Yes, it happened to be that game. Very sad makes me wanna cry each time i have to leave my spouse.

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Hey I’m also [somewhat of] a writer… And I know how hard it actually is to write a good story and writing is an art and artists need all the support they need and deserve. And I’ll follow this project of yours and I am really looking forward to see how this goes. G’luck with this project.

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Congrats on releasing a demo!
That’s an interesting start. Good work with introducing the lore and the MC. Good luck, will wait for the next updates!

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I love the demo so far. At first I wasn’t sure about the style, it’s not something I’m used to but it works so well to suck the reader in and I am looking forward to seeing more.

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What i’ve seen some authors do with POV changes, is that on the page where the perspective changes, they write the name of the POV we’re looking through in bold letters

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I went into this demo (without reading the synopsis) with high hopes thinking this is like any other super hero story.
and now after reading it…
I still got high hopes but now its mixed with a dash of sorrow and a pinch of angst. :smiling_face_with_tear:
Idk how you were able to do it with just a prologue and an interlude, but this demo was able to enrapt my mind into this story
AND THE RO’S chef kiss :man_cook: even if we’ve only really scratched the surface of the story and characters, im already hooked on the blackbird ro’s (we havent gotten the chance to meet the twins now older but im sure ill be hooked on them also)
so now that you, @Anjie, have got me hooked on this demo/wip, you’re gonna have to deal with my constant questions about the storys lore

like how much time have the Blackbirds and Lifeline known with one anothers?

will we be able to explore more events that have happened in Lifelines and the Blackbirds past or is that left up to interpretation?

For those of us who decided to go save the civillians, will we get the chance to meet Candence and “Blossom” again?

Will we still be able to taste test those milkshakes while ignoring our pending doom ?

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Sounds interesting

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I am in love with this story. I really enjoy stories where you can experience the aftermath of the MC’s effect on the plot and this one sure seems like a very promising emotional rollercoaster. You have me intrigued and I’ll be sure to stick around :smile:

A quick question: when we get to chose a mask, is the full face mask option the type to show the eyes like a robber’s mask or is the whole face fully covered?

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Damn, this is really sad. I can’t wait to have my heartbroken into a million tiny pieces.

Keep the great work up, you have an excellent writing style.

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I’ve tried that, but the look of it felt jarring to me so I went with what you see now in the demo. I’ll likely be using this form for now, until I find a better way to do it!

I’ll be happy to answer them, though I hope you can also understand that a few things may be too spoilery to reveal!

They have known and worked with one another for two years. I do want to add at least a couple more insights into their past, so you can better define their friendship.

Well… there’s a reason why she’s coded into the startup file, and not as a temporary variable :wink:

Knowing time is short just means you have to make the most of what’s left, doesnt it? There’s only so many more milkshakes you can drink, before…well. ಥ_ಥ

*Edit I’m so sorry I missed this one!

That would be up to your artistic discretion! I want players to have as much freedom in designing your outfit as possible.

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This premise is really great. I can’t express how much I love this. I really hope you go through with the whole killing of the MC thing.

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This is truly amazing!! I just had to comment on this. I was so sad when I got the end of the demo, I needed more! I’m so excited to get my heart crushed into a million tiny pieces. Keep up the amazing work, Im certainly keeping an eager eye on this one! :raised_hands:

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I found a piece of code here at the bottom.

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Normally I am not one for endings involving the mc death, but this has me hooked! I am definitely following this story.

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Weekly Update: 12 June 2022

What has been done:

  • updated the demo with bug and typo fixes; thanks again to all those who submitted them!
  • wrote ~750 words for the first scene of the next chapter. *not yet added to the demo

That’s… really little, I know :face_exhaling: I had written about double that, but had to throw away much of it, because I felt it worked better this way. It happens frequently, and I’m learning to be okay with it, as I’m very much a panster/planter - and by that, I mean that I can plan all I want but when I write… well. Sometimes my brain ends up going in a wholly different direction.

For instance - the prologue didn’t at first exist. MC was supposed to simply awaken in the medical bay, with readers reliving the past in a long flashback. But then as I began to type… my brain whispered a condescending tch, boring, and joyfully threw my poor plan out of the window.

Anyway, the first 200 words are always the hardest for me - but now that I’m past that point, I am optimistic things will go more smoothly!

Goals for next week:

  • finish writing + coding the first scene of chapter one.

Here’s a little out-of-context quote…

May the week ahead be a lovely one, and thank you for the likes and clicks <3

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When this was posted the title alone made my Spidey sense tingle and I was like ‘Yeah, that looks like a trap!’’.

Waited for some and then took a peek and read the Summary and yup, totally confirmed what the Title suggested. It is a TRAP!

Now here I’m, after reading this and walking in said Trap.

So dear author, I will give you the same advice I gave to the Dev who made Life is Strange: You better sell boxes of kleenex alongside your game if you gonna make me whale that much!

I don’t mind the MC dying, the martyr route is a familiar one, I’m so looking forward to the agony.

Wishing you all the best going forward! :hugs:

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I love the concept for this game! It is so unique, and seems like it will have a lot of piping hot angst! And some hot LIs to boot :two_hearts:

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