@SirEdmund any chance we could get blurbs on physical appearance with the personality ones in the first post? Partly just cause I’m curious about having it compiled (I’m sure there are descriptors for everybody but I don’t quite remember them other than Reid) and partly cause I wanna know what Alice looks like but am going to cover up my blatant favoritism for a character who hasn’t appeared yet by asking about everybody
Just wanted to pop in and say that the writing style and world-building here has blown me away! Keep up the fantastic work, this is gripping sci-fi at its best! I love, love, love all of the little touches–the phone, the forms–and how information is doled out without becoming overwhelming or hand-holdy. The humor here is also on-point: I can’t wait for more!
(Also: there’s an extra period after “Exuberant” in the hair options!)
(And selecting “I ran into some guy in the market, I don’t understand why I’m here” leads to a repeating loop where the choice appears once more. I didn’t think to snag a screenshot!)
There were a couple more minor things I caught that could be debated over, but I didn’t want to go overboard. In other news, god damn it Rami why won’t you shag me already. I slept in my underwear for you.
@HomingPidgeon: I can definitely put some physical descriptions up, that’s a great idea (I even have a few face-claims, is that something anyone would want to see??). I tend to be really light on character description in my writing because I don’t want to bog the story down and I like to leave things up to the reader, but on the other hand that can make it hard for folks to picture the characters. And sometimes I forget to describe people entirely, I don’t think I mentioned a single thing about poor Rami, I’ll have to work on that. Looking back it seems like all of the details I do include are hair-related. ¯_(ツ)_/¯
Anyway, yeah! Look for some physical descriptions coming soon-ish!
@rinari: I’m so glad you like it so far! Little random details are my favorite thing to write, I probably spend way more time on them than I should, but they can give a fun insight into the setting. (I actually spent days trying to figure out what I should call everyone’s communication devices, until finally I read a sci-fi that just straight-up called them phones, so I went with that, haha.) It’s been fun seeing everyone’s responses on this forum, and I’ve received a lot of great feedback. I really appreciate you taking the time to point out errors, it’s not possible to go overboard, every error pointed out saves me a lot of time and helps make the story better. So thank you!
This comment made me choke on my tea, lol
Faceclaims would be awesome, I’d be super interested in that! I said “blurbs” but tbh I’d love as much detail as you can get, I love that stuff
Though I would also love to see other folks’ personal headcanons
I probably haven’t provided enough detail for that yet
I was working on putting together an update with descriptions for everyone, but then I got distracted and started doodling instead. So here’s everyone’s favorite ex-something-or-other, Alice:
Other characters coming soon(ish).
First off–I love that portrait!! Alice looks great and that color palette is my weakness
And I was doing a quick run through again, and got some repetition in passages. Last time I played Reid left, and I just had Isaac and Rami on the ship. This time I convinced Reid to stay and I had the passages about settling Isaac on the couch repeat two or three times, and the passages about putting Rami up in Alice’s room (including the exchange about our past relationship) repeated three or four times. Looked like they were looping back in on each other
Yikes, that’s embarrassing. I’ll look into this and try to sort out the mess of spaghetti that is my code. Did your playthrough have Rami in it? I guess logically he had to be if someone has to sleep on the couch, but I might have mucked up that logic.
That portrait of Alice is amazing! I’m so jealous of people who are talented at both writing AND visual art, that’s so cool!
Woops, forgot to confirm–yeah, that time I had all 3 of the potential companions–Isaac, Reid, and Rami.
@HomingPidgeon: Awesome, thank you. Looks like I have some good ol’ fashioned duplicate code, haha. I have some other fixes that have to go up, I should have this all up sometime this week. Thanks for the feedback!
@rinari: thank you so much! now I need to do the rest of my space children…
Have I made it clear I love Alice yet? Cause I love her. And I’m not saying I wanted to hear what she looked like specifically for fanart but like, I’m not NOT saying that so
Holy crap, this wonderful! No one’s ever made fan art of one of my characters before, I’m having a lot of feelings right now.
Thank you so much!