A Tale of Heroes (WIP) Updated 22/2/2021

Hello, everyone! My name’s Juan, and I’ve been working on a story for one of my ideas in the past few months. :slight_smile:

Summary

The year is 2020.

You are a college student in Giga College, from the similarly named Giga City. Your days consist of stuffy professors and their long, boring lectures.

Or they did, at least, until you awaken latent superpowers, and your entire life gets turned on its head.

Taken under the wing of the world-renowned League of Heroes, you’re now a rookie in training that will soon spend their days protecting the citizens of your city from attacks by criminals, villains, and even natural disasters.

Juggle the expectations of your new allies and the increasingly strained political climate of the country as President Stratton tries his best to wipe your team’s goodwill off the map, all while figuring how far your newly-found abilities can, and will, take you.

But something more lurks in the underbelly of Giga City. Your appearance has set many plans into motion, just as it has toppled many others. And it won’t be long until decades of resentment rear their ugly heads upon the League and the citizens it has sworn to protect.

This is Giga City. This is your city.

Don’t let it go down in flames.

Art

"I am Seeker. My search started long before I picked up the sword, and it will go on long after I am expected to put it down. That is the oath I have made."

Done by Mmeizn.

Done by Daniann__.

RO Info (Spoilers! Don't check this before playing at least the first two chapters.)

Aki: 21 year old heroine. Extremely shy, she tends to be looked after by Forlorn. Any attempts to get close will have to go through him.

Characteristics: Dark hair, with blue-colored tips. Blue eyes. About 5’6 or so. Likes really cute things. Are you a cute thing?

Nova: 22 year old genius. Cocky, though can back it up. Somewhat guarded about his own person, so getting anything more than a shallow connection might be hard.

Characteristics: Latino, amber eyes. 5’11 or so. Spends most of his time tinkering with machines. Built much of the equipment you use.

Latooni Kitamura: 21 year old rookie, same as you. Pretty upbeat, though the whole hero-ing business might be more than she can chew.

Characteristics: Asian-American, purple hair, green eyes. 5’10. Likes joking around a lot, and your closest friend when you join the League. “First Girl Wins”? Maybe!

Ignis (Laura Coltello): 25. Founding member of the League. Literal definition of a trust fund baby, to her great dismay. Recent developments have left her in a weird place emotionally, maybe you can help?

Characteristics: Blonde hair, green eyes. Extremely rich, even outside of the League. 5’10. Her eyes were on someone else recently, but nothing ventured, nothing gained, right?

Mars: 23-24. Personal bodyguard to President Stratton. Pretty nice, unlike his boss. It’s clear he’s making the best out of an awful position. But maybe he doesn’t have to. Try and convince him.

Characteristics: Olive skin, blond hair. 6’0. His eyes are a deep, fiery red. He seems to take his job quite seriously, even if he doesn’t quite look like it. Then again, dating the guy that your boss hates might not be the smartest move…

Currently, the demo consists of the prologue up to the end of Chapter 2, coming out to a clean 47k words. Updates will be coming regularly-ish, at least once or twice a month, as I take time to write whenever I have a moment from school and work.

This is my first attempt at writing a CYOA story, so any and all feedback would be greatly appreciated. :grin:

More specifically, I’d like to know if everything flows well, as I’m not a native English speaker, as well as your thoughts on pacing, the characters and the use of player input. Likewise, if there’s anything you particularly like, please let me know, so I can continue things in that vein. My code-knowledge isn’t very deep either, so if there’s any advice on that front, please feel free to mention it as well!

If there’s anything I haven’t mentioned here, please don’t be afraid to bring it up. I love talking! :grinning_face_with_smiling_eyes:

Without further ado, here’s the demo link: https://dashingdon.com/play/juan/a-tale-of-heroes/mygame/

I hope you have fun! :smiley_cat:

Also, if you have any questions or comments, here’s my Tumblr page: http://juantheashura.tumblr.com

Hop on over!

213 Likes

Well, I really enjoyed that. Found some not so good things tho.


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Are there any romance options?

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very interesting plot! the characters were great, too. Would Romance be added to the story? (I’m a sucker for romance lol) there was a lot of text walls, maybe break it up a bit? …not a lot of choices, slightly railroaded in my opinion.

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Love it can’t wait for the next update​:fire::fire:

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Heya, are you referring to the screenshots, or something about the plot? If it’s the former, I think I just got them. I updated the game, so they shouldn’t show up anymore. :slightly_smiling_face:

Yes, Nova, Aki and Latooni will all be romanceable characters. The option to begin pursuing them will appear when the MC’s training has advanced a bit more.

Any examples of where you saw the text walls? Breaking them up should be rather simple, and as for choices, what would you like to see? The MC isn’t having too much free reign yet, but that should change around Chapter 2.

Also, thank you all for your nice comments! I really appreciate them. :grinning:

4 Likes

This was really good!

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This was really fun and I can’t wait for more. I mean, superpowers? The chance to be the most chaotic, OP jerk out there? Sign me right up!

4 Likes

I think this is really interesting!

some pronoun inconsistencies I noticed tho~ my MC is female :slight_smile:

image

image

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I noticed one mistake? I think? In Forlorn’s description you wrote “as his list of historic feats grows larger and larger” I think you meant to write heroic instead but I’m not sure.

Loved the story so far and the characters, I’ll try to read it again to give a better feed back later.

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Ooh superpowers…

I’d suggest adding options for naming, for lazy readers or people who don’t really mind what name their MC has.


I chose the female option.

It seems quite interesting!

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Damn devils, no save option (yet?)?

Oi @Jjcb

Like @gomisegye mentioned in their post, my MC is a female…

Found few more @Jjcb


Another one…

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@redfield @gomisegye @Empress_Nightmare

All pronoun errors should be fixed now! Apologies for those, though I guess that’s what writing at 2 AM gets me. :grinning_face_with_smiling_eyes:

If you find any more, please bring them up.

I have also added a few name options before forcing the player to input their own, so please check it out. Quicktest tells me it works, but you never know… :sweat_smile:

Once again, thanks everyone for the compliments!

3 Likes

I’m playing again and I can’t see them

edit: the last name options are there though

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Really awesome can’t wait to read more love it

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Okay, now it works, I believe. Stupid capitalization… :expressionless:

Oh, I also forgot to mention, Nova’s profile is also up now!

2 Likes

It says Forlorn sheathing his swords when it should be Seeker.

1 Like