A Supernatural Story WIP (Next Update: Late January/Early Febuary)

adult-fiction
gender-choice
low-fantasy

#41

True, which is why my mc would prefer to just wear the collar or its equivalent and hone his mind and body the badass normal way. Though without tech or magic to make up the gap there is only so much that can do against real powers, but it is at least better than nothing, or in the mc’s case his/her/their own “powers”.


#42

Man these observations you’ve made are incredible. You’re right in that the MC has to find other ways to become successful in their own right.

I plan to make this an underdog story of sorts, in that you have to prove that you aren’t a failure or just some stuck up rich kid. This, of coarse, can go many different ways.

Im also loving these ideas for powers guys, its really making me think! :thinking:


#43

Well I can broadly see two ways forward for my mc, 1) become or at least try to become a superhero the badass normal way like Batman, which probably requires him to become a successful businessman and make his own fortune first or 2) study to become one of the foremost and perhaps the foremost scientist on super-heroes/meta-humans, probably also helps to have a fortune, hopefully made of tech the mc can (help to) invent in that case so he can run his own top-notch lab or tech corporation.


#44

I don’t think I’ve read anything quite like this. I love it.


#45

I’m glad you loved it!

Progress Report: I’m about twelve pages into chapter 1. I’m expecting to have at least thirty to forty pages in each chapter, but that all depends on what I come up with.

As of now, I’m currently writing the MC’s interactions with their sister and the rest of the family. I’m also introducing some new characters into the story, so that’ll be awesome. So expect chapter one to be made up of more character interactions. The main story will be in the chapter, but only towards the end.


#46

I’m excited to interact w/ the MC’s family (I consider my MC to be the “Cool Older Sister” type so i look forward to having that card to pull, or maybe some options to embarrass our lil sis in true older sibling fashion)

Anyhow, I did finally draw my MC though I kinda rushed through it >

Her name is Cass and she’s a gal of few words (bc she’s tired and done w/ everything and nothing makes people angrier than ignoring them) with fewer weaknesses (which includes smoking obviously but also includes cute girls.)

Edit: wow the quality is not so good uploaded like that I think maybe next time I’m gonna link it or something it’s… quite bad


#47

I don’t mind the quality, the drawing is quite good!

And I’m excited about the MC’s family too. I’ve been debating on how to do the sister’s introduction and I just now started re-writing it. The parents on the other hand are going to be very fun to write. Expect the mother to be very assertive and critical of the MC. The father will be more passive and compliant.


#48

Well that would just push my mc into overdrive in his quest to make his own fortune and become successful in his own right, not wanting to end up like his dad. Depending on how well he takes to his sister and vice versa he may still be inclined to do the brother sister team up, only with himself not as the costumed hero but as the supporting scientist, assuming the mc can be(come) brilliant enough to make that worthwhile.


#49

Progress Report!

The word count is rapidly racking up as I close in on the twentieth page in chapter one!

As of now it is 10,546 with command lines, and 9,564 without.

I am on the sixteenth page as of now, but I still need to fill in some empty spots on pages that come before, so it is extremely likely that the word count will sky rocket. But since my birthday is approaching and finals is starting to rear its ugly head, I highly doubt i’ll get a huge chunk done, but once school is out, it’s open season on this piece!

I’m also figuring out all the other major places and characters that may play apart in the story. Writing Villains takes a surprising amount of work that I didn’t realize.

As of right now the story is going in a very Urban Fantasy route, but I am debating whether to pull out the big guns and mix in some more wild and fantastical elements into the mix.

What do you guy’s think about dimension hopping? Or rather, what do you guy’s think about the idea of having a different world attached to earth by a curse or a rift of some kind. I have ideas about implementing magic into the world, I already came up with a basic outline. But I don’t pan on making the main character taking a huge part in learning magical arts. However, I do plan on having the MC stumbling upon something that could give them extraordinary power…with a price.


#50

Progress Report 2!

The word count right now is 16,565 with command lines and 15341 without. Yay!

I’ve reached passed the page limit from 12 pages, to a whopping 36! As of now, the chapter one draft is done!

But…not completely.

As of now I am finishing up some choice dialog, along with editing sentences to make this even more legible. I wouldn’t be surprised if the word count is bumped up more by the time I release this chapter.

As to when I finally update…expect it to happen during or after the second week of December. I’m so excited to see what you guys think!!!


#51

Just found this today, played through it a few times, and I can say that I’m eagerly waiting for the next update.

If we’re still doing the esper powers suggestions, maybe someone who can talk to spirits (not just ghosts, but nature spirits and the like)?

Sidenote: Clay is best bro


#52

Depending on how you introduce the little sister, her personality, and how she shapes the world around us, I can see my MC making the deal…

Oh, who am I kidding…as long as the deal doesn’t restrict him in any way and also let him retain his free will, of course he’s going to take it! No way he’s letting his little sister upstage him, not any longer.


#53

Is that possible for us to not feel jealous toward that sister? Because it seems to me that from the start the MC is depressed over the idea of not being heir which really, can be quite troublesome sometime because of big expectation and all that so, can we feel indifferent or relieved of the fact that we are not heir? But still, that does not mean that I appreciate the favouritism of the mother because of the difference in power. Being the most competent for the position of heir is one thing but being the favourite because of being “better” is another.


#54

You make a good point.

It is possible not to feel jealous of the sister, but with how a lot of people act around you, It could be kinda hard not to. You could say that the MC is bitter about not being the heir, and acts like a delinquent to live out their frustrations on the world. But it is up to the player wether the MC let’s go or holds onto their anger throughout the game.

That’s where the deal comes into this.


#55

Hehehe…about that deal part…

The MC stumbles upon it by the actions of their sister, and it is kind of forced on them unwittingly. If you have ever watched the anime Parasyte, the MC’s situation is quite similar.


#56

Ugh, now that scenario, being stuck with an unwanted passenger is one of the few things I can think of that would make my mc who is more happy for his little sister and tries to keep his jealousy in check and support her turn sour on her.
Not having powers is one thing, constantly battling with and being in danger of losing yourself to a monstrous parasite, particularly if said parasite also ruins his body (or at least the aesthetics of it) is a fate that is very possibly worse than death.
Which would mean it would become my mc’s quest to get rid of the parasite in any way possible.

Well that’s certainly your opinion my mc would be rather more afraid of losing himself and in any case takes poorly to having to share his body at all. No power is worth that.
Of course if the result is a Tuvix situation (which was one of the most morally disgusting episodes of that series and a wasted character-building opportunity, but anyway I digress) then the mc has already lost and the new person will likely be an entirely different entity and their own person altogether with the old mc and the parasite as its “parents”.


#57

Hmm…as long as the entity were sharing our body with is as nice and pleasant as Migi then I have no complain. Heck, it would actually make the deal sweeter for me. Finally! Someone, err, something that actually cares for my MC.

I…I have no word. Does the little sister know about it? Why did she do it? Did she do it accidentally or willingly?


#58

In the prologue I mentioned that most of the freshmen were absent from school. They’re all on a field trip of sorts, including your sister. She comes back with something strange, and her friends are in on it too. They just don’t know what exactly it is or how dangerous it could become if set free. Its an accident on your sister’s part, her curiosity is what will put the MC in danger.


#59

I don’t know if you’ve ever read the Dark-Hunter series, Chronicles of Nick or any of those books by Sherrilyn Kenyon…but the writing kinda reminds me of them. And my character reminds me a small bit of Acheron. Maybe it’s just me. Idk. Tbh if you have read the Styxx or Acheron books…the way you describe his relationship with his sister sorta matches. That’s kinda cool lol.


#60

Haven’t read any of them, but I might check them out!